7 Natural Diuretics To Make You Pee Like CRAZY!

Warning:  Just because these are "natural" does not mean they're safe in all circumstances or in unlimited amounts.  Ask your doctor before using diuretics if you have kidney or heart disease, and do not exceed the recommended doses of each substance listed here or combine diuretic substances, natural or not.  Doing so can increase the risk of life-threatening electrolyte imbalance via dehydration.  Remember that everything you see listed here is intended only as an occasional addition to your regular diet and water intake.  

Ahh, diuretics.  Those magical substances that make the bladder produce its golden warmth both more urgently & in larger amounts.  From alcohol to prescription diuretics like Lasix (furosemide), there are a wide variety of substances that push the piss through the pipi pipes faster & more furiously.  But what about natural non-prescription options?  If you're looking for something to add that extra "oomph" to your holds, consider one of these fine foods or herbs.  Here are 7 of the best proven natural diuretics to consider adding to your diet or alternative medicine cabinet:

7.)  Lemon:  Yup, plain old juice from a lemon supplies a burst of citric acid to increase urine production as well as containing a high water content.  For this reason lemonade is often recommended for treating and preventing kidney stone formation.  ("Milk, milk, lemonade...")  If pure lemon is too tart, simply adding a twist of the sour citrus fruit to your water bottle can help get things flowing.

6.)  Asparagus - Who knew this unassuming green veggie could power pee production?  It's true:  asparagus contains asparagine, an amino acid that acts as a diuretic & has been known to treat swelling, arthritis, rheumatism, and PMS-related water retention.  But heads up:  your pee will smell EXACTLY like asparagus for a while after consuming it, so skip this one if you're planning more intimate pee play.   

5.)  Watermelon:  As the name implies, watermelon is packed with H20, which goes straight to the bladder & will have you pissing your britches in no time.  That's because it's not just high in water content but, like lemons, is full of pee-boosting citric acid.  It also contains potassium salts that regulate urine acidity.  Ahhh, smooth.

4.)  Dandelion:  A menace in the garden, this poof-producing weed is a well researched diuretic that can be brewed into a tasty tea or taken as an extract.  A 4% aqueous extract of the leaves & roots was shown in studies to be safe & produce the desired toilet-trotting results.  

3.)  Parsley:  A fresh-smelling herb long used as a garnish for soups and salads, Parsley has relatively potent diuretic effects when ingested.  It's thought to work by inhibiting sodium reabsorption & potassium transport, though the exact mechanism isn't known.  Beware that parsley in large doses can interfere with blood clotting medicines due to its high Vitamin K content and may have seizure inducing effects in people with epilepsy, so use with caution.   

2.)  Kratom:  The leaves of this Southeast Asian bush are potent both as a pain reliever & a diuretic.  This social media analysis by the Digital Commons @ Texas A&M University states that kratom's diuretic effects can cause increased urination as well as dry mouth & dehydration.  This herb is controversial due to its addiction potential, so avoid frequent use if you decide to try it & be sure to research dosage, side effects, interactions & other vital safety info.

1.)  Caffeine:  Coming in at #1 is our old standby, caffeine.  It's versatile and comes in many forms, from pills like No Doz to tea, soda, energy drinks & coffee.  You can even buy caffeinated gum!  Every last one of these options will increase the amount & urgency of your whizz, especially when combined with increased water intake.  The pills may be more dehydrating than the drinks, as the beverages contain liquids that at least partially replenish fluids lost via urine & sweat.  However, the pills are easier to dose accurately than natural options like coffee or tea which contain varying amounts of caffeine and may also irritate the bladder more due to their high acidity.  Ideally you should not exceed 350mg caffeine per day, with 400mg being the absolute upper safe limit for a healthy adult. 


Bonus:  Celery & celery seed.  If parsley is too soapy-tasting for you, try celery.  This calorie-neutral veggie is packed with water, and its seeds speed up uric acid excretion and increase the rate of urine production. 

That's it!  Got a favorite diuretic you don't see listed here?  Love to hear about it in the comment section!