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| Cast of UrineTown. Why didn't they just go in their pants? |
Just read about Zuckerberg & Musk's depressing company towns & got to thinking: if any of my omo readers hits it big, you should create a pee-friendly township where wet pants are welcome everywhere. No sexual stuff or unwanted advances--just a regular town where everything's exactly like normal except one thing: you can piss yourself in public anywhere, anytime with no judgment. Here's my blueprint for the ideal place of this kind (We'll call it 'Omolandia' for now) -
Population: Soaked 💦
Gym - Drench your Spandex running shorts while sweating it out on the cycles or squatting to deadlift in the weight section, then change into some dry clothes and do it all over again. Pee as much & as freely as you like, just don't be a lunkhead.
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| "Focus on gains, not stains" at the Omolandia gym |
Shops - What better way to spend a lazy Sunday afternoon than casually window shopping or perusing the sales racks at your favorite stores with a full bladder as you let little spurts go in your undies? So relaxing! If you're feeling especially bold you could pop a squat on the ledge in one of the dressing rooms & treat it like a toilet, flooding your pants completely after trying on a new outfit. No judgment in this UrineNation!
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| Dressing rooms double as restrooms in Omolandia. |
Coffee Shop - While you're out shopping or running errands, don't forget to stop at the coffee shop to rehydrate with some tasty drinks: coffee, tea, smoothies & plenty of H2O for all your bladder-filling needs. Hydration is kinda sacred in Omolandia. Can't have a bunch of yellow pissers stanking everything up.
Park - Enjoy a leisurely stroll through our scenic park, where humans & dogs alike can be seen letting loose as the urge arises. The only difference? Humans do it on the slide, the swing set, the merry-go-round & the park bench.... dogs just use the sandbox or a tree.
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| These peeing statues in Kyiv would look ADORBS in Omolandia Park. Just sayin'. |
Public Pool - I know what you're thinking: who in their right mind would wanna share a pool with a bunch of proud pissers?! But unlike other public pools that are 50% water, 20% chlorine & 30% urine, Omolandia's swimming hole is pee-free since swimmers are encouraged to piss everywhere else in town! Lifeguards can be seen wetting their swimsuits & trunks from their towers but weeing in the pool is strictly forbidden.
Bus - Every legit city has public transit, and Omolandia's no different. All aboard the Omo Express, where you can conveniently piss right where you sit or stand as you wait for your stop.
Theme Park - Enjoy a sweet treat or some deep-fried comfort food after riding one of our thrilling roller coasters that's sure to scare the pee right out of you. New pants can be purchased in the gift shop as many times as you need them.
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| No more haunted house or roller coaster shame: all wetters welcome. |
Movie Theatre - Got a hot date? Catch a flick at the $3 Cinema where snacks (including large drinks) are cheap and you don't have to miss the movie to go to the lame-ass restroom. Just go in your seat! Ahhh, free warmth; sweet relief.
Bar/Grille - What better way to spend a Friday night than heading to the sports bar w. your buds, enjoying some brewskis & betting on your fave team? Losers have to waste their pee in the toilet. (Boo!)
Nightclub - Where does the Omolandia in-crowd go on a Saturday night? To the nightclub of course! DJ's, live music, packed dancefloors & not a bathroom in sight. Fill up on your fave drink & let it all out on the dancefloor when your bladder reaches critical capacity. Just don't slip down in your own puddle.
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| 2 ladies pee freely at a club. Imagine a town full of this. |
.........of course this special little slice of heaven would require a lot of pee-friendly janitors, cleaning products & cops/security guards to keep the pervy rule-breakers out, but it could definitely happen. (Maybe we could get a sponsorship from an adult diaper company or Clorox)? If nude beaches & sex clubs can exist without rapes & other violent crimes, so can Omolandia!
Townspeople & visitors would have to observe the "casual wettings only" rule--no masturbation or sex in public. If you have to pee in public in Omolandia, it goes in your pants: no exposing yourself allowed. No kids past age 2 (and then only at kid-friendly places like the shops, movie theatre & pool) & no non-omo friendly visitors or journalists welcome at any time. This is a safe space, not a freakshow.
People with actual urinary incontinence would always be welcome due to the non-sexual nature of the town, which could be revolutionary. Where else can these folks feel completely un-judged in society? I can't think of a single place, and that's sad. Meanwhile the ability to pee anytime, anywhere would lead to fewer UTIs and bladder/kidney infections, which would hopefully show the world that there's nothing to fear about this way of life & it can actually be healthier than the mainstream way. Who knows? Maybe other places would start instituting self-wetting policies, or at least society's attitudes would soften toward the behavior once enough scientific and social data piled up. 🤷🏼♀
Just don't forget to credit this little pissblogger for the idea (and give me a small stake in the town plz) when it happens, K? 😚
What would you add to this dream town? Is it just a dream or could you see it becoming a reality one day if a rich enough investor funded it? Epstein had a whole frickin' island & ranch, ffs. Surely we can have our happy (and safe) pee place. Or perhaps we should start an annual meetup akin to the Gathering of the Juggalos or Rainbow Gathering/Burning Man first to see how it works out... test the waters so to speak lol. 💛 🚫 🚽
Leave your thoughts in the comments below!
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